Sunday, June 7, 2009

I've had it. i just spent the last 2 hours fighting with my husband about money. Mainly about this no spend challenge, so I guess its off. It is impossible for do this by myself. What is the point of me suffering all week,, going without things, then the first chance he gets he runs to the bank and withdraws 20 bucks, without telling me!! I am trying to buy a whole weeks worth of groceries for 5 people,,,,, more when you count daycare kids,,,,, for 45 dollars.....(which buy the way didn't work out,,, it was impossible to get everything I needed for that and I was told if I didn't come home with everything on my list I would be in "trouble". I spent 65 total.

20 may seem like no big deal to some,, but when I'm trying so hard to spend so little, ...........It is a lot. :( I'm just so tired of it. We are like 2 different people and it scares me. We never resolve anything when we argue....he cant ever see my point.

I just don't see how I can do it, when he isn't on board with it. so I guess I will just try my hardest, and do what I can here and there. The problem is it makes me resent him,, when I'm doing things to save,, like only pennies on the dollar, and hes goes out and just blows money on things. What am I supposed to do? Obviously its not worth breaking up my marriage. Ugh.....

Then I found out that I will probably be losing yet another day care kid because the dad is changing shifts. whatever... I'm just about to give up. It seems the harder I try to make things work out, the worse it gets.

sorry about all the complaining. It really helps me to get it down into words though.


Tereza said...

I'm not sure if this makes you feel better at all but just wanted you to know I'm reading and you are in my thoughts. Life is sometimes quite complicated!:(

Anonymous said...

Rant all you like!

Please let the $20 go, it's not worth it. It does matter but not if it involves a marriages!

I know you are trying to save. To make a point you could take his $20 bank receipt and put it in a jar/baggie and each time he does it put it in there. When he comes to you and ask where the savings is give him the jar/baggie.

Don't let this squelch your challenge! Make this a permeate challenge! You only shop on shopping day. That's the rule from now on. That's our rule. :)

I'm sorry to hear about the daycare kids. Put an ad in the paper or a flyer at the Y.


Simplelivin' said...

It's hard to do it on your own without your spouses support, but stick with it! Don't get discouraged, and please, don't resent your husband.

I've been there. I tried to do things on my own and completely cut off spending. My husband would go behind my back so he wouldn't get in trouble with me.

I sat down with him and we went over our budget (that I had made) together, and made modifications. We both compromised and was able to create a misc category where we both got $20 each month to spend however we liked, no questions asked.

Everyone's situation is different, but sit down with him and see if you can't agree on working something out. Start with baby steps, once my husband started to see the progress we were making he started to change and was extremely enthusiastic about getting out of debt.

Good luck!!!

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