Wednesday, April 22, 2009

The gym

The whole Y/gym/fitness center ,,,,is a whole new concept for me. I've never been big on exercising, and especially not in front of other people!!! I am to much of a worrier. Worrying about what people will think of me,, but then I joined belly dancing class and loved it, and realized there are people out there in this world that are bigger than me... and certainly if they can do these things than so can I. After all isn't it really all about what makes ourselves happy? So I decided the only way I am ever going to start really losing weight again is if I start exercising, but it proved to be to difficult at home. When I"m here Emma demands all of my attention and when she doesn't have it, she is screaming!! (anyone have any suggestions for that?)
So I decided that I would join our local YMCA,, they have the workout room, free childcare while you workout, and all the programs are discounted that they offer for the kids! I love it! And the big kids love it too! Even hubby, who was very sceptical likes going now too!

Its funny though,, as I'm working out so many things are going through my head. It's usually when I'm doing cardio, cause when I'm using the weight machines my full concentration is on lifting, but there I am working away at the elliptical,, sweating my hinny off(I never knew I was such a sweater until I started working out too) and these things are running through there,,I'll just list them,that will be easier
-why am I doing this?----so I can be healthy and get in shape
-will I ever be skinny?---will I ever be happy with the way my body looks?
-will I ever look like that girl?----remember Jill, the big goal is to be healthy
-I wonder why that guy is here? or that girl? I wonder how long they have been coming, they are still big,,,,,, will I be big forever?
-look how skinny that girl/guy is, are they only skinny because they workout---do they have an eating disorder?
-will I stick with this----YES
-I wonder what they are thinking about right now.
-will Bennie stick with this????
-I wonder what my body will look like at Dawn's wedding
-Man I'm tired
-wow only 5 min left
-I'm so happy I'm doing this!

I know now ya'll think I'm crazy,, but those things really run through my brain pretty much ever time I'm there. And it may sound like I'm judging other people, but I'm not,, I'm really just comparing myself to them. I shouldn't do that, but I do.

I really do enjoy it though,, I look forward to that hour of alone time(even though I'm not really alone), it is a great stress relief for me.

What do you guys think about when you workout?


Dawn said...

I have a ton of random thoughts that race through my head when I'm working out too. I like to think about everything that I have to get done that day and I organize my whole day, decide what I'm going to eat that day, when I'll do my homework, what shows are on that night, and what time I should go to bed to get 8 hours of sleep that night. Haha. It doesn't really seem that weird to think about those things while your thinking them, but when you look at it later its pretty silly.

I think working out is a great way to get those crazy thoughts that might cause stress out of your head. As for comparing yourself to others, I do that too a lot in the gym. It seems like there are always people there that look better than you, and there are always people there that look worse than you.

I think about how long people have worked out too. There is this older couple that are working out every single time I go and the lady has the hugest butt ever! She speed walks for 30 minutes and then weight lifts for at least 30more minutes and her butt is still huge. Hahah. Makes me not want to get old.

Jill said...


Anonymous said...

I use an exercise bike at home....before I would watch the minutes tick away....not fun...made it harder in fact. Now I read a book and boy does the time fly!

I do all of my thinking in the shower! :D


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