I'm feeling very sad and alone. How is that possible really?? To feel all alone when your in a house full of people? When your laying in bed beside the one you've been with for 12 years? I feel like they are all against me. Well everyone but the 2 year old,, she loves me, and when she misbehaves I know its just cause she's 2. They say I'm always complaining about something, never happy(HA, I hate to say it but I'm not the one that's never happy!). Maybe I am in the wrong,, maybe I should just let the kids do whatever they want. Treat each other like crap. Mouth off to anyone and everyone including me. Sit back and watch the one I love poison his own body and drink away the pain every single night. Yeah,,,,, I guess I should just let them be.
Obviously I can't do that right? All I want is for our family to be a happy healthy loving family. I am trying so hard to teach my children right now about why its important to do certain things and why we need to treat each other with kindness and respect. I want them to understand that we are family and need to stand with each other,,,not against.
I don't know what to do. I'm so worn down from hearing that I need to just let things be and not worry about it. How much do I take? How long do I sit and watch as my family slowly disintegrates? Either way something bad is gonna happen.